YOU MIGHT BE A MORMON!

If you buy wedding rings in bulk, then you might be a Mormon.

If you have more siblings than co-workers, then you might be a Mormon. Or a Catholic.

If you've had more doors slammed in your face than I've had hot dinners, then you might be a Mormon.

If your house of worship looks like it was designed by colorblind alien Goths from Disneyland, then you might be a Mormon.

If you've ever detoured miles out of your way, just to avoid having to drive through the sin-crazed metropolis of Branson, MO, then you might be a Mormon.

If you have a favorite Osmond, then you might be a Mormon.

If you think Ken Jennings' winning streak on Jeopardy is proof that LDS is the one true church, then you might be a Mormon.

If anybody in your family is named "Lehi", "Brigham" or "Utah", then you might be a Mormon.

And finally, if riding up in the crotch is the least of your underwear problems, then you might be a Mormon.